Where my friends live: Kristen Stewart, somewhere in LA (or whatever)
November 1, 2012 § Leave a comment
Oh, Hello. Friend, I’m so sorry I have not been around. Full disclosure: I’ve been in a Twi-hole. Yes, this is embarrassing but occasionally I become so enraptured in the Twilight franchise that I lose touch with reality. It’s a real thing.
The first time I heard about Twilight was the first time I watched it. I knew nothing about the phenomenon going in, and though for the first 15 minutes of the movie I laughed along with my friends at the cheesy dialogue and predictable plot lines, I could slowly feel myself being overcome. As soon as RPatz’s pale brooding face filled the screen, I was hooked. I may or may not have at one point uttered the words “I want all of him inside me” very loudly in the theatre–I actually can’t remember, the whole thing feels like a dream. The point is, this all happened, and for better or for worse my heart still flutters at the thought of their undying (real life) love.
In the past few months that love has died, been resurrected and now the following abode plays host to it. Honestly, I’m a little disappointed. It’s kind of tacky, no? I guess it doesn’t matter what your house looks like when your boyfriend is regularly licking your armpits (that’s hot, I’m almost positive). I want to say other quippy things but life is too short for us regular mortals to be quipping all day long, neglecting all gainful employment. Mama’s gotta work.